The Art of Communication

It's been just over five months since Jeff and I were married. And every day it gets better. We are simply comfortable together. And as the months have gone on, we have discovered more and more ways to be comfortable with each other. We are learning the great Art of Communication. On a Saturday afternoon, about a month after we were married, I announced to my husband that I was going to the grocery store. We were out of just about everything. So when I arrived home about an hour later, I was loaded down with all sorts of goodies. I pulled into our attached garage, grab as much as I could and headed inside. We live in a split level home, and my husband was "downstairs" in the family room which is just inside the house from the garage. He was playing his favorite computer game...I let you guess what the name of it might be. In any case, he was 2 feet from the door I entered through. I staggered in the door and up the stairs to dump my items in the kitchen. Then back downstairs to get more. On the third trip when I was grabbing the two 12-packs of soda and close the car door, I was NOT a happy person. My husband had not moved. I was so mad. In fact, I slammed the door when I came in for the last time. I think that got my hubby's attention. He turned away from his computer and said "Hi Hon, need some help." I sooooo wanted to rip his head off. But I simply said "Well you could have helped me with all of the bags." And bless his heart, he was so apologetic. He told me that he would have happily helped me if I had asked. He just wasn't paying attention. I just stared at him for a minute. How could I be mad. He was right. I technically hadn't asked him to help. But I had ASSUMED he would hear me huffing and puffing. So, the next time I needed help with something and the next time I came home from the grocery store, I marched right in the door and said "Honey, I'm home, can you help." And he emptied the entire car. He is a doll and very considerate of others. He just needs someone to ask. And I have learned to ask for help. I had a friend in college that always used to say "When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me." Darn if he wasn't right. I no longer ASSUME anythng in our marriage.