The Art of Communication

It's been just over five months since Jeff and I were married. And every day it gets better. We are simply comfortable together. And as the months have gone on, we have discovered more and more ways to be comfortable with each other. We are learning the great Art of Communication. On a Saturday afternoon, about a month after we were married, I announced to my husband that I was going to the grocery store. We were out of just about everything. So when I arrived home about an hour later, I was loaded down with all sorts of goodies. I pulled into our attached garage, grab as much as I could and headed inside. We live in a split level home, and my husband was "downstairs" in the family room which is just inside the house from the garage. He was playing his favorite computer game...I let you guess what the name of it might be. In any case, he was 2 feet from the door I entered through. I staggered in the door and up the stairs to dump my items in the kitchen. Then back downstairs to get more. On the third trip when I was grabbing the two 12-packs of soda and close the car door, I was NOT a happy person. My husband had not moved. I was so mad. In fact, I slammed the door when I came in for the last time. I think that got my hubby's attention. He turned away from his computer and said "Hi Hon, need some help." I sooooo wanted to rip his head off. But I simply said "Well you could have helped me with all of the bags." And bless his heart, he was so apologetic. He told me that he would have happily helped me if I had asked. He just wasn't paying attention. I just stared at him for a minute. How could I be mad. He was right. I technically hadn't asked him to help. But I had ASSUMED he would hear me huffing and puffing. So, the next time I needed help with something and the next time I came home from the grocery store, I marched right in the door and said "Honey, I'm home, can you help." And he emptied the entire car. He is a doll and very considerate of others. He just needs someone to ask. And I have learned to ask for help. I had a friend in college that always used to say "When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me." Darn if he wasn't right. I no longer ASSUME anythng in our marriage.

Colors of our world

Our latest home adventure has been painting. I have to tell you from the start that my husband is both very patient in this area and very agreeable. While he may have an opinion, typically his answer is "whatever you'd like, honey". I think I mentioned a few days ago that, before I moved in, e walls on his house were all construction cream. The house that I owned was far different. I was fortunate that the person who owned my house previously gave it the "Pottery Barn" treatment. Each room had been painted a very inviting color. The only changed I had to make was to the bathroom - pale aubergene. What a lovely name and a beautiful color. With the finishing touches of my fleur de Lis shower curtain hooks and purple shower curtain, it was magnificent.

So I made the decision immediately to bring pale aubergene with me. And in only his way, Jeff said "whatever is fine with me, honey". So our first guest bedroom suddenly morphed from drab to dramatic.

As with any other engaged couple, we went through the task of registering for gifts. This is where construction cream came in handy. We were able to select colors and styles for each of the bathrooms, our bedroom and one of our guest rooms. And our friends and family could help make our house a home. I already had everything I needed for the purple bathroom. Our next task was the 2nd guest bathroom. I'm not sure why I picked black and gold...other than the fact that I am a HUGE New Orleans Saints fan. And while there are no helmets or footballs in the room, there are black and white sketches of New Orleans and a black and gold Mardi Gras mask in the wall. If it weren't a small bathroom, I might even consider a black "chandelier" but I think that would be too much.The final creation was our master bathroom. I have to admit, I had no idea what color scheme might work best in this room. Our master bathroom is quite large. It's almost the size of my bedroom at my old house. I LOVE it. Nice soaking tub and a separate shower. And just enough room between the double mirror and vanity to add a 19" tv/DVD combo on the wall for watching during my soak or when I get ready in the morning. I know, a tv in the bathroom?!?! Most people laugh but most are very anxious to see it when they come over. The last touch was to find the perfect color for the walls...God Bless automatic color match. I had selected a beautiful shower curtain for our registry that had a cream, brown and seafoam green coloring. I simply took it to my local Lowes, they plugged it into their computer and poof! Out came the perfect shade of bluish, greenish, grey.

I knew I married the right man when he didn't bat an eyelash at any of the colors that I brought home....next up, the front room/kitchen. I'm already head to Lowes to find the perfect RED!!! More to come....

Oh what a difference a year (or two) can make...

It's been almost two years since I last blogged. And life has changed so much! For starters, I met the most wonderful, caring man and we got hitched! That's right, this Southern Belle married a Yankee. Well, half Yankee. Which works out perfectly because, I am half Yankee myself.

It's been almost 4 months and I can honestly say that I love him a little more each day. He is truly a good-hearted person. There may be people that he doesn't like, but he will simply say that he doesn't like them. He doesn't talk bad about them or try to put them down. That's amazing to me and something I am trying to do myself.

We are very fortunate that this is the first marriage for both of us. But with both of us being older and more settled in our lives, it has been a bit challenging. We decided to live in his house...excuse me, our house. This meant either selling or renting my house. I am fortunate to have some friends that were looking to rent. Their lease will be up in a few months and we will begin the adventure of "what now."But, as with everything else, we'll cross that bridge when needed.

The second adventure was combining two households. Both of us had quite a bit of...stuff. And we both had very different ways to handle things. Since I was the one moving, I chose the "just give it away" approach. Is took 3 car loads and one trailer load but it all went to either the Salvation Army or ReStore which is run by Habitat for Humanity. Hubby has quite a few collectibles and so we are still working on what will stay and what he might sell. But for now it's all in one closet downstairs so he has plenty of time to sort.

And bless his heart, he has done well with my decorating take over. Before I moved in he'd lived there for about 5 years. And the walls were still standard construction cream. We've now tackled painting three bathrooms and are about to start on our bedroom and the family room. By the end of summer everything should look very lived in...and then maybe we'll have a new adventure....something a little "smaller" ;)....stay tuned.